Expert. Congratulations! You scored 120!

Wow! You know your stuff! In fact, you know it almost to well. But that's someone else's problem. Way to go! You're tops, and dragons fear you.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 92% on XP

Link: The RPG gamer Test written by shatari on OkCupid Free Online Dating

Your Taste in Music:

90's Alternative: Highest Influence

Classic Rock: Highest Influence

80's Rock: High Influence

90's Pop: High Influence

Progressive Rock: High Influence

80's Pop: Medium Influence

90's Rock: Medium Influence

Adult Alternative: Medium Influence

80's Alternative: Low Influence

Country: Low Influence

Hair Bands: Low Influence

Punk: Low Influence

How's Your Taste in Music?

You're Bender! You scored 57 slurminess!

Bite my shiny metal ass! Your descriptions: tough, a smart ass, sneaky, insensative, bastard. Just be careful of weaknesses: stealing or "borrowing", nicotine, gambling, and of course, anything with alcohol.

My test tracked 1 variable How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 99% on slurminess

Link: The Which Futurama Character R U? Test written by curtschilling38 on OkCupid Free Online Dating

I Speak a Good English

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

15% Upper Midwestern

10% Dixie

10% Yankee

5% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Are You A Nerd

Cows & Politics Explained

A CHRISTIAN: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.
AN ATHEIST: You have two cows. You believe in the survival of the fittest, the hell with your neighbor.
AN AGNOSTIC: You don't know if you believe cows exist, but if they do, you want two too.
A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You're punished and lose your other cow.
AN AMERICAN REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?
AN AMERICAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell both to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.
A CANADIAN LIBERAL: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You form a Royal Commission to study the effects of having two cows verses having one or no cows. You hire your friends and pay them huge sums of money and never produce a final report.
A CANADIAN CONSERVATIVE: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You hire a US accounting firm to prove that it's the previous governments fault.
A CANADIAN NDP: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You take everything from everyone and force everybody to live in a commune. The criminals then take all the cows, so everyone has the same amount of cows, none.
A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk, sometimes.
A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.
DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.
CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A CANADIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. The government taxes you and takes both cows and gives them to a Quebec corporation.
A QUEBEC CORPORATION: You have two cows. You demand two more cows from your neighbor, sighting your cultural heritage as the right to special treatment.
A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. They are mad. They die. You make meat pies and sell them to German tourists.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count again and learn you have 42 cows. You count again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship both of them.
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.
A NATIVE CASINO: You have no cows. You convince your white neighbor to play cards and win his two cows.

UN 
Yes, time for the royal boot also!

Red Vs Blue 
Make sure to tell everyone interested in moving to Canada that they will have to choose the right part of the country. They can't live just anywhere, that would ruin the colour coating.

Whenever I hear people attack the US, I think of this scene from The
Life of Brain:
FRANCIS:
We're gettin' in through the underground heating system here, up through into the main audience chamber here, and Pilate's wife's bedroom is here. Having grabbed his wife, we inform Pilate that she is in our custody and forthwith issue our demands. Any questions?
COMMANDO XERXES:
What exactly are the demands?
REG:
We're giving Pilate two days to dismantle the entire apparatus of the Roman Imperialist State, and if he doesn't agree immediately, we execute her.
MATTHIAS:
Cut her head off?
FRANCIS:
Cut all her bits off. Send 'em back on the hour every hour. Show them we're not to be trifled with.
REG:
And of course, we point out that they bear full responsibility when we chop her up, and that we shall not submit to blackmail!
COMMANDOS:
No blackmail!
REG:
They've bled us white, the bastards. They've taken everything we had, and not just from us, from our fathers, and from our fathers' fathers.
LORETTA:
And from our fathers' fathers' fathers.
REG:
Yeah.
LORETTA:
And from our fathers' fathers' fathers' fathers.
REG:
Yeah. All right, Stan. Don't labour the point. And what have they ever given us in return?!
XERXES:
The aqueduct?

REG:
What?
XERXES:
The aqueduct.
REG:
Oh. Yeah, yeah. They did give us that. Uh, that's true. Yeah.
COMMANDO #3:
And the sanitation.
LORETTA:
Oh, yeah, the sanitation, Reg. Remember what the city used to be like?
REG:
Yeah. All right. I'll grant you the aqueduct and the sanitation are two things that the Romans have done.
MATTHIAS:
And the roads.
REG:
Well, yeah. Obviously the roads. I mean, the roads go without saying, don't they? But apart from the sanitation, the aqueduct, and the roads--
COMMANDO:
Irrigation.
XERXES:
Medicine.
COMMANDOS:
Huh? Heh? Huh...
COMMANDO #2:
Education.
COMMANDOS:
Ohh...
REG:
Yeah, yeah. All right. Fair enough.
COMMANDO #1:
And the wine.
COMMANDOS:
Oh, yes. Yeah...
FRANCIS:
Yeah. Yeah, that's something we'd really miss, Reg, if the Romans left. Huh.
COMMANDO:
Public baths.
LORETTA:
And it's safe to walk in the streets at night now, Reg.
FRANCIS:
Yeah, they certainly know how to keep order. Let's face it. They're the only ones who could in a place like this.
COMMANDOS:
Hehh, heh. Heh heh heh heh heh heh heh.
REG:
All right, but apart from the sanitation, the medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, a fresh water system, and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
XERXES:
Brought peace.
REG:
Oh. Peace? Shut up!
[bam bam bam bam bam bam bam]
[bam bam bam bam bam]

What have the Americans ever done for us? Don't get me wrong, I like to rib the Americans too, but that is where I draw the line. I know that when we need them, they will be there for us. Before Canada fell on its face, we would always help our friends somehow, and don't forget that our Queen supports the Americans. The UN has done what to help the world? What has Kofi Annan done to make the world a safer place? Talk, that’s all we hear out of the useless, ineffective, morally bankrupt bunch of blowhards! I have no faith in the United Nations, remember the League of Nations? Soon it will be as relevant as that old organization.